Frosting for the Cause: Best thing I ever baked for

I have not had much time to write on my blog but I have just lifted my head above water. I made a commitment a few months ago and I was bent On keeping it. I committed to do Frosting for the cause. Yesterday I baked my guilty pleasure chocolate cupcakes. This baking was like no other. The feeling of baking for a cause that has affected so many people. I wrote on the blog that cancer has not affected me personally but how dare I forget that my grandmother lost her fight to lung cancer about nineteen years ago. I was young and I try to keep only good memories in my mind. I am so happy I was able to bake for a cause much more important than a local bake sale or my kids birthday. This cause is one that crosses racial barriers as well as financial barrier. Thanks to Paula and Frosting for the cause people everywhere is becoming more involved and not just watching in the background.

Enjoying Your Kids

In the fast pace world called motherhood, we have to take time and enjoy or childre, Here are a few ways to get the much needed housework done while enjoying your children at the same time.

1. Sing one of the family's favorite tunes while you clean a room together

2. Bake a cake and let the kids help you ice it (no matter how it looks) or enjoy sharing the batter off the mixer attachments.

3. Include the kids in your excercise routine. Allow them to ride their bike while you brisky walk beside them.

4. When planning the monthly meals let the kids choose a the night, the menu and prepare the meal together.

5. Family Reading time, share a story or just break and get some quiet time where everyone reads a book of their choice in the same room.

Quality time does not have to cost a arm and a leg, you can enjoy your children just by doing things together to create laughs and memories. I find that I enjoy my children better when we do simple things together and I find that my children beg for more days like these and less days at Chuck E Chesse.

Sweetest Time Of The Year

Glittery red hearts and Sweetheart Candy gives February a very sweet feeling. For those of us who have a valentine, sweetheart or boo this month can be greatly anticipated. If you are single it could be a dreaded month. However, it doesn't have to be. I can remember when I was in college my friends and I would do secret Valentine or choose a mushy movie and bring candy and make Valentine Baskets. It was quite fun. I grew up in a single parent home and I would be my mother's valentine from time to time.

I believe that we have gotten so wrapped up in the candy and teddy bears that we loose the meaning of Valentine's day which is about love. It does not have to be a romantic love to be valid. You may say sure you can say that because you are married, but today in the mail unexpected I got a card from a friend. I hold this friend dear to my heart and to receive a Valentine's card in the mail from her really made me remember the purpose of this time of year. It is not to make the chocolate makers and jewelry makers more rich, it is time to show our love for each other whether it me mother to daughter, father to son, sister to brother or friend to friend.

Remember that this is the sweetest time of year give out Valentines this year to unexpected people like your mailman, the corner store owner, or your child's teacher.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Just the Two of Us

Things can get pretty hectic in our house, we have five children as you can see all with different needs, different personalities and in different stages of life. It seem sometimes that me and my husband have to sneak to be alone. We have rare moments when someone from the church or family members will relieve us of the children , but never all at once. Spending time together is important to us. My husband is my best friend and I love spending time with him. So we came up with a few ways to spend time together just the two of us. Maybe you have five children like us or you have one and notice that you and the hubby are losing your Just the Two of Us time try these three quick tips.

1. Strict bedtimes: If you put the kids to bed at the same time each night when it is time for them to hit the sack you will have less of fuss and then you can spend more time cuddling with your boo.

2. Wake up a little earlier: Our house is as quiet as a mouse at 5 and 6am. So sometimes my husband and I sacrifice a little sleep to steal a few hours together. We may go for a walk around our house or enjoy a quiet breakfast. Whatever we decided to do its our time.

3. Brib family: This may seem far fetched but it works. My sister normally does not like to baby sit all five of my children, but if I promise her something she more apt to keep everyone and for a few hours we can get away and enjoy a good conversation in the park or a peaceful dinner at our favorite resturant.

These are a few of the things we do to get a little Quality Time. If you have some other things you do to get a little Just the two of us time do share.

Untouchable Wisdom

Phenomenal Woman, I Know Why the Cages Bird Sings, and  Still I Rise all very popular poems written by one America's greatest writers of our time, Maya Angelou. I have read her work since I was a little girl, I have even performed her pieces in oratorical competitions. Maya Angelou has a way with words that I only pray that God would give me.

I had the opportunity last night to attend an event where she was the keynote speaker. As the Lawton- Chiles Multiplex filled up on the campus of Florida A&M University with those young and old, black and white to hear all that she had to share you could feel the excitement of all who entered. I sat on the edge of my seat, attentive waiting for every nugget that would drop from her mouth. She spoke so softly, but every word carried so much weight. I wanted to cry many times throughout the night, but those around me would have understood.

I have  been inspired by Dr. Angelou for so many years, I even prayed the same pray she prayed as a child every time I wrote in my journals as a child, "God, please whisper the words in my ear". She spoke for about two hours but she said things in a few words that would have taken me volumes to say. So much of what she said I want to teach  my children, " This is your life not a rehearsal". She made me grateful for the few people who has been able to inspire and encourage me they were the " Rainbows in my clouds". Many who came last night were young college students and had to be there for extra credit, but for me I have experienced somethings and more now than before I understood some of the things she spoke about and I am inspired.

I may  never be able to personally tell Dr. Angelou how seeing her and hearing her story blessed me and forever I will be grateful for her untouchable wisdom.

Right In Front of My Eyes

When I became a mother, I pushed my dreams of law school and becoming a Supreme Court Judge to the side. After, I had my second child I figured that I would continue my education when she turned two years old, but to my surprise I was pregnant by the time she was three months old and remained pregnant for the next three years. I began to doubt if I would ever return to school.

I found myself resenting my my life and being a stay at home mom. The letters to repay student loans began to pour in and I was did not have a job because I had decided to stay at home and raise child. "The nerve of me", I thought to myself. This could not possibly be a good idea. My husband assured me that I was doing the best thing for our children and that in the end it would all pay off.

For the next three years as the babies kept coming, I remained at home with the kids not because I didn't want a job  but because we couldn't afford childcare for four children under the age of five. Then, in August when I gave birth to my fifth child something clicked. I felt a little happier about the added responsiblity. I didnt know what it was maybe post partum in reverse but it was a difference in how I felt about my family and my life as it was.

Our oldest started kindergarten and my three year old started preschool. Along with school days not my son decided he wanted to learn to play the piano and my daughter wanted to be a real life ballerina. I gave birth two weeks before all of this began. I thought I would be out of my mind to have taken on such a task. When the time came I planned ahead with packed snacks for the younger kids and activity books while we waited for each lesson to begin and end.

In December, my husband and I took a five day cruise for our wedding anniversary and we were leaving the kids with my  in-laws. My mother in law asked to write the baby daily routine down for her. I found myself typing and typing and when I finished I had wrote a page on each child and what could be expected from them even the oldest wanting to sleep in the living room on the weekends. After I was done, I did not think much of it I emailed it to my mother in law. She called and said that she was amazed at how detailed the instruction sheet was and at that moment I knew that was the reward my husband was speaking of; the reward of knowing everything about your children.

I found the reward of being a stay at home mom after five years of doing this day in and day out. I realized that I had an advantage. a close friend of mine gave birth shortly after me and had to return to work after six weeks which dramatically affected her milk supply but I was still successfully nursing my daughter. I realized that I have never had to be informed of something new my children were doing because I have been there for every moment, so I loosen my grip on the halls of justice and tightened my grip on the success of my family and decided to do what I really loved cooking and writing. I am in the process of starting a small bakery and catering company called CRUMBS Bakery and Catering Co. and I have started penning my new book  Only Paper Understands.

It took me some time to realize the blessing in being a stay at home mom, but my advice to you if you have the opportunity to stay at home and raise your children its a good thing. You kids will soon grow and be independent enough for you to do whatever your heart desires. So open your eyes because your happiness could be right in front of your eyes.

Family Getting You Down?

The old saying goes "You can't live with them, and you can't live without them". Some would beg to differ. Regaurdless of the dynamics we all have family. While growing up you just have to manage one group of people, but when you get married there are two sets of parents, grandparents, sisters and brothers, and aunts and uncles you have to please. The Holidays are no longer anticipated with joy but with stress about how to make both families feel important or included.

Its not always easy and there is no real science to getting it right. My best advice to anyone is to do what works for your house. Too many times husband and wives get in the business of pleasing their parents and lose themselves and the idea that they have set for their homes and children. Do not get me wrong families matter and parents and grandparents feelings should be taken into consideration, but give very little attention to their opinions when it can cost you marital or money issues. Nothing is worth creating problems in your marriage or putting the family account in the hole.

Families should be understanding of each situation and although thats ideal its not always the reality. So please do not allow family to get you down. Continue to reassure them that they are loved and be the shining example they need to see.